Tonight, per a certain three-year old's request, I squished myself onto a (very sturdy) toddler bed. I laid there beside him stroking his hair while he curled into my body and whispered "I love you" and "Do kangaroos have arms?" His nightlight behind me, I made shadows on the wall. He didn't mind that I can only do a duck and a spider. Then he tucked his head into the crook of my arm and stayed there until his breathing became slow and steady and his body grew heavy with precious rest. He didn't see the bittersweet tears streaming down my cheeks. I'm so thankful that despite all the times I've failed him, I must have done something right to deserve this sweet boy's love.
8 years ago at around this time Jackie was graduating from seminary after 5 years of being in New Orleans. We were excited and full of hope. It felt like after years of preparation our lives were now going to REALLY begin! The seminary had hosted a sort of ministry fair for students to meet with representatives from across the United States. Jackie talked to me about which state representatives he’d like to talk with as we planned our perfect life out in our heads (HA!). He mentioned Alaska which I quickly vetoed; we thought it would be lovely to live near the mountains somewhere out west—maybe Colorado? Montana? However, I went back and told him to talk to the Alaska guy if he wanted to because I didn’t think it was right that I should tell him no. I don’t remember all the states he inquired about that day. I remember him bringing home a memo pad that said West Virginia on it, and I remember him talking ALL ABOUT ALASKA. Now when God speaks to me I unfortunately do not have a light
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